In this part of Nephi's story, he and his brothers had just gone back to Jerusalem to get Ishmael's family. They were fleeing into the wilderness, to be led by the Lord to a land of promise, away from the destruction of Jerusalem . . . so they needed wives if their colony was to survive. Part of the way back to their camp, Nephi's brothers begin to complain along with some of Ishmael's family and they wanted to turn back to Jerusalem. Yep, camping and journeying in the wilderness is hard work. And they had forgotten about God's promises of not only Jerusalem being destroyed, but that they were going to a land of milk and honey, a land blessed above all the other lands of the earth. They lacked the faith that God could help them get there.
When I think of God being able to do all things according to His will, I remember the Red Sea opening for Moses and the Children of Israel, Daniel in the lion's den, Elisha and the chariots of fire, David and Goliath, the fall of Jericho, and many, many other miracles in the Bible.
There have been many miracles in our modern day as Jesus Christ has restored his Church in these last days. There have been many geographic places on this earth where the opposition to build a temple was fierce -- or the opposition to allow missionaries in certain countries was fierce -- but we have always prevailed. There was always a way through, and we know where the miracle came from. The God I worship can do all things.
I feel like there have been miracles in my own personal life because God can do all things if he wills it. If He can move mountains, then He can help me pass a test or soften a heart. One experience in particular that was a cause of much heartache was the bearing of children. When my husband and I were finding out about each other before we were married, trying to see if we were compatible and had similar goals, we talked about a future family and what that would look like. Because he had virtually been an older child, he wanted a lot of kids and I did too.
Well, after having only one child, he changed his mind to my great sorrow. I felt like with each child that followed after, it was a great fight and battle to get another child into our home. It should have been a time of joy and happiness and a time of sharing and anticipating a new life, but it wasn't. It was painful and I was emotionally drained by the time he finally relented to having another child. It was especially frustrating for me because I was completely healthy, willing and emotionally capable of raising more than one or two children. After our third, I knew he wasn't going to budge any more, and it broke my heart. I knew we had the capability and the financial ability to bring more children into our home, and he wanted no part of it. And then. . . .
I started to exercise faith and I started to pray as if everything depended on those prayers. I discovered a wonderful book about getting answers to prayer and I treated that book like a textbook, practicing line upon line, expanding my perspective, gaining hope, and finally submitting to God's will. When you pray for something so desperately, the bottom line is it will only come from God if it's for your good. I had to get to a place where I needed to completely trust in God that maybe it wasn't in my best interest to have that fourth child. When my prayers finally turned from pleading to gratitude for the 3 beautiful children I had, when they turned from begging to my telling God that I would be okay if I didn't have any more children, that is when the miracle occurred. The God I worship can do all things -- and He softened Bill's heart enough for him to suggest that we bring one more child into our home.
I have four beautiful children. They are my greatest treasures. And now that I can look back with 20-20 vision, it was God's wisdom that we stopped when we did. He definitely helped me get to a place where I felt my contribution as a mother was significant and enough, but he also knew what was coming down the road and needed me to be patient.
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